Criticism

So many of us are guilty of the act. I for one can say I've done it on more than one occasion and am not proud of it. We criticize, and not in a good way. Sometimes self-criticism can be healthy, it keeps you looking good, well educated and helps ensure your position as an accepted member of society. I want to discuss some criticism I've run into lately.

In a professional atmosphere (and I won't name which one for privacy reasons) we expect to find professionals. Not only are these people suppose to know their stuff, but they should conduct themselves in a professional manner. Being surrounded by adults in this such situation, I find it absolutely absurd that people are conducting themselves much like a bunch of bullying children. Whispering behind someone's back, making nasty comments, even going so far as to call them names and exclude them. It is very disconcerning to watch adults act this way and it is completely unacceptable in this situation or any other. I would like to speak up but do not want to put my job in jeopardy and so wish to do so only at the end of my term. If it becomes an issue however, I feel it is my duty, as a professional, to intervene.

I was put face to face with some criticism recently in my teaching, some constructive criticism. Even if we know this is a good form of criticism, hearing it is never easy. Tuesday afternoon my classroom was becoming chaotic and I was unable to regain control. This situation was made no better by the fact that I'd gotten 4 hours sleep the night before and had just finished giving the kids marshmallows with which they were to construct solid shapes and then they could eat. Silly teacher! So yes, got a few tips, of which at the time were a hit as I've never had an issue in this particular area of teaching, but which, when put to the test today, came in very useful. So thank you to my constructive criticizers! Still, a word of advice to anyone who wishes to give this form of criticism, please add at least 1, if not 2, positive elements to the conversation! For every negative there should be two positives, always keep this in mind. It saves people from feeling beaten down and it would have been nice to have heard that afternoon while I was feeling as squashed as the marshmallow I later found on the bottom of my shoe.

One kind of criticism I've been trying to combat lately is the kind that constantly goes on in my head. Not only am I extremely critical of myself, I can also get that way of other people. For example I am a big comparer, and this is particularly with other women, I like to size them up. Am I taller, prettier, have nicer hair, skin, am I slimmer, do I work out harder, am I better educated, am I classier, older, more experienced, smarter? ... the list goes on. Then there are the down right rude things that can pop into my head, "wow she's huge!", "oh my gosh she has the most annoying laugh", "I wish she would just shut up, she sounds like an idiot" and even "so glad I'm not her". I am challenging myself to focus on being less critical of others just this week, in an effort to turn my thoughts around and actually create a positive thought process that comes completely natural. So rather than thinking "wow she's huge" I will turn it into "wow she has amazing eyes" or if she does really have a annoying laugh, realize that she is likely happy and is very lucky to be so. In a big city where people come and go, be the one to smile and pass someone a compliment because they have an awesome hair style or wicked boots. Do something nice for someone just because, karma always comes back around, even when everyone else is too busy to watch!

I think if I can change my thinking pattern to be less critical and to be more accepting of others I will be an overall happier person. I challenge you to do the same, try it for a week and notice how much more content you feel at the end of the day. Does it make a difference?! Let me know and I'll keep you posted on my progress too!


Hugs from the city,
Sara